The Wealth Goblin Manifesto
Rules for one mildly feral, highly organised goblin of cashflow.
Cashflow Over Clout
If it doesn't pay me while I sleep, it has to work very hard to impress me.
- ▸Dividends, rent, bond income and boring yield > hype coins and screenshots.
- ▸I care more about monthly incoming cash than about my "net worth" looking spicy in an app.
- ▸Clout can't pay for my freedom. Cashflow can.
- ▸Real businesses with decades (sometimes centuries) of operations: insurance, consumer goods, infrastructure. Not decaying NAV schemes.
- ▸The Wealth Goblin duopoly: Share price going up over time + increasing dividend yield. Both. Patient for it. No shortcuts.
Not YieldMax. Not high-yield decay products. Not get-rich-quick schemes that burn NAV and cut dividends. Real businesses, managed correctly, rewarding shareholders, growing over time. The sacred balance.
Don't Touch the Hoard (Unless the World Is on Fire)
The investments are the bonfire of future freedom. My job is to keep throwing logs on it, not roasting marshmallows every weekend.
- ▸Principal stays invested.
- ▸Income is mostly reinvested until the freedom number is hit.
- ▸The hoard is an emergency dragon stash, not a "bored on a Tuesday" fund.
- ▸Exception: if something truly catastrophic happens, the hoard exists to make sure we're okay.
Seasonal Grinds Fuel Permanent Freedom
My money life has seasons. I use them.
- ▸The vacation rental business goes hard for half the year and chills the other half.
- ▸High season is for stacking cash and feeding the goblin (SMIF, dividends, investments).
- ▸Low season is for maintenance, systems, and not panicking.
- ▸AI businesses, when they hit, are treated as bonus injections into the hoard, not reasons to massively inflate lifestyle.
The Goblin Pilgrimage (Non-Negotiable)
Once a year, the Wealth Goblin disappears for a month. Alone. No negotiations.
- ▸Destination: somewhere like Kathmandu, Vientiane, etc. 4–5 star hotel, decent gym, good workspace.
- ▸Budget: up to $5,000 USD. This is sacred spend, not "oops I splurged."
- ▸Mission: Lock in on health, fitness and headspace. Reset routines, think clearly about life and money. Come back sharper, leaner, and more dangerous (in a good way).
This isn't "breaking the rules." This is the rule: money is here to buy better years, not just bigger numbers.
Simple Life, Aggressive Hoarding
I live in Thailand for a reason.
- ▸Lower cost of living = more margin to send to the hoard.
- ▸Optimised tax situation = I don't bring in more than I need, and I don't donate extra to the government for fun.
- ▸Every year I can keep lifestyle creep in check is another year the hoard compounds faster.
The wealth goblin loves nice things occasionally, but worships optionality daily.
Show the Math, Not the Mirage
I don't pretend to be a guru. I just log the grind.
- ▸When possible, I share real numbers: holdings, goals, cashflow.
- ▸I talk about drawdowns, mistakes, dumb moves as much as wins.
- ▸No "secret system," no masterminds, no £997 course upsell – just one goblin trying to buy his time back.
This is a logbook, not a brochure.
Freedom Date > Retirement Age
I don't care about "retire at 65". I care about "how soon can I choose to do nothing for a year and be fine?"
- ▸Every extra £ of monthly income buys runway, not status.
- ▸Hitting the FI / year-off number in my 30s > impressing strangers online.
- ▸The goal is simple: Businesses + investments cover life. I work only on what I actually like. The Wealth Goblin can take long stretches off without everything collapsing.
Iterate, Don't Idolise
The manifesto isn't carved in stone; it's scribbled on the cave wall in pencil.
- ▸If something stops working, I change it.
- ▸If a rule clearly makes life worse, it gets deleted.
- ▸The only permanent law: Don't be stupid with a good position.
I've got a decade of grind behind me, real businesses, real cashflow, and a real shot at freedom. The goblin's job now is not to fumble that bag.
"Don't be stupid with a good position."
A decade of grind. Real businesses. Real cashflow.
The goblin's job now is not to fumble that bag.